Paper 3 rough outline

Christopher Burning

English 101-5:30

Dr. Sonia Begert

11/23/15

Rough Draft for Position Paper

·         Opening/ Hook: Rhetorical question/ stunning fact.

·         Paragraph one: possible survey conducted by myself or another

·         Paragraph two: argument presented by source 2

·         Paragraph three: counter argument presented by source 1

·         Paragraph four: argument presented by source 3 refuting the counterargument

·         Closing: Conclusion or summary

Incorporating Sources Effectively

1. http://www.hercampus.com/style/op-ed-defense-photoshop-why-magazines-should-photoshop-their-models for Photoshop of Women in Magazines

Chen, Alice. "Op-Ed: In Defense of Photoshop: Why Magazines Should Photoshop Their Models." Her Campus. Style, 2 Aug. 2012. Web. 19 Nov. 2015.

In an article by Alice Chen in HerCampus website, the author states, “As an editorial publication, a magazine strives to meet its standards of perfection. In the same way that an article passes through the hands of multiple editors, a photo experiences a meticulous retouching process in order to represent the best version of itself. And like the words in a written piece may change during the process, the colors, textures, shapes and other details of a photo may be altered without losing what that image is at its core.”

2. http://www.nytimes.com/2009/05/28/fashion/28RETOUCH.html against PhotoShop

Wilson, Eric. "Smile and Say ‘No Photoshop’." The New York Times. The New York Times, 27 May 2009. Web. 19 Nov. 2015.

In the New York Times article concerning PhotoShopping of models, Eric Wilson indicates that the amount of PhotoShopping that happens now is astounding. Images have always been effected in one way or another. Whether that be the use of lighting, exposure, angles but more recently software. The use of software in this age has taken models to the point of  unrealistic and unreachable levels of perfection. In some ways they look like creatures from another planet.

3. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/vivian-diller-phd/photoshop-body-image_b_891095.html against PhotoShop

Diller, Ph.D. Vivian. "Is Photoshop Destroying America's Body Image?" The Huffington Post. TheHuffingtonPost.com, 7 Aug. 2011. Web. 19 Nov. 2015.

According to Vivian Diller, Ph.D psychologist in private practice, "Photoshop can contribute to unrealistic body image expectations, eating disorders and other emotional problems. Surprisingly, professional and public reactions are mixed." In her article entitled "Is PhotoShop destroying Americas Body Image?"

Spriggs essay and personal essay analyses

1.      The Sprigg’s essay is Sprigg’s forming and sharing her opinion on local grown organic produce. Her opinion was expressed that the advantages of locally owned farms outweigh the disadvantages. She then presented very picky counterarguments that counter argued her point so her position looked stronger.

2.      The second article we analyzed was about the legalization of marijuana in Colorado. The article was more pro legalization of marijuana because the data supports that highway fatalities have decreased since the legalization of marijuana. Some counterarguments that they made were that the anti-pot group, SAM pointed out that even before the first legal pot store opened in Washington State, the number of driver in that state testing positive for pot jumped by one-third.

3.      The last article we analyzed was the unrealistic nature of Photoshop and people to what we accept as “standard”. It was mainly against it due to the number of facts represented in the article. For example, from the 1990’s to now, due to photo shopping there has been an 119% increase in eating disorders for children 12 years and younger.

4.      The Sprigg’s essay and our analyzed articles differentiate due to lack of counterarguments in the positive and/or negative positions. The articles are more statistical-based, rather than the Sprigg’s essay which is more observational. However, the Sprigg’s essay and the analyzed articles are all similar in the way that they all have a very strong stance and position on their topic.   

Katherine Spriggs Essay Questions Response

1. To me it's obvious that this is a topic that matters to her a lot because she has so many personal connections to it. She has also convinced me that it matters. She did this through the use of her rationalizing and her facts and statements. Something that also plays into me being convinced is my education in Environmental Science so I know that what she's saying has ground to it.
2. Spriggs acknowledges the counterargument of buying locally can effect both the environment and economy negatively. She responds to the environmental effect by stating that it would be a waste to try to grow every kind of food locally but she then says that "buying local should instead focus on buying as much as possible from nearby farmers". She responds to the economic factor by saying that it would probably effect the global economy but improve local ones.
3. Paragraph eight and nine are good examples of the essay being effective. In these parts the essay uses an explicit position, good reasons and evidence, attention to more than one point of view and a response to what others have said or done.
4. The first photo helps support her argument because it gives an example of an easy way to buy local. The second and third photos provide significant contrast. The second photo shows a small poly-culture farm which seems nice and quaint and sustainable while the second photo shows an industrial mono-culture farm which, from the angle it's taken, seems unsustainable and very bland and not inviting. The fourth photo gives us an idea of how many trucks are on the roads when traveling because it shows just one car and three massive semi trucks and one box truck. Giving the impression that it could be too much.

Arguments Arguments Arguments for paper #3

Possible Topics: Gasoline vs Bio-Fuel, Drinking Age, Photoshoping Models for Magazines, Time and Resources spent conserving the Earth, College Tuition and Debt vs Free College and The Government keeping track of peoples lives.

Examining Homework of "Two Sisters Tragic Story"

From the video about the Two Sister Tragic, it had an emotional appeal because in the first line it established that the video was about grief. Secondly, they establish an emotional aspect to it they always have the parents “red-faced” with tears with the dog and with clips from their childhood. This video also had a logical appeal because the bottom line is that drunk driving kills and promotes driving lessons and they provide free transportation to insure safe driving throughout teenagers. This video showed ethos through the use of the video clips of their childhood to show that these people are just average and normal people, and that this can happen to anyone.

How Thing Mean

Symbols of Patriotism:

USA: Suggests High patriotism, strength and power. Firstly, they use the symbol of America which is of the highest patriotism. Secondly, the eagle itself looks as though it’s extremely stern portraying a position of power. Thirdly, the American flag is on the eagle itself further giving a sense of patriotism.

Great Britain: Suggests that Britain is powerful and stands out from other nations whilst still being humble. Firstly, the dog looks off into the distance but also looks as though it’s not going to back down, giving a sense of power. Secondly, they use a light colored dog, which gives a sense of innocence while maintaining the ferocity that the dog is.

France: Suggest that France is more about the people and their ethical standards. Firstly, there’s not representation of their flag. However their slogan is carved in stone which suggests that it’s ever lasting compared to the dog and eagle because they have a limited amount of time. Secondly, the picture shows a camera which is used for surveillance and that means they’re focused on their people.

Watches:

Rolex: Suggests that you are in a position of wealth and power. Firstly, it does this through the use of the name, “Rolex” in general because it’s an expensive brand. It tells that the person is in a financially stable enough point in their lives to splurge money on luxury items that they don’t necessarily need.

Hello Kitty: Suggests that it’s for the youth and something to temporary satisfy a person. Firstly, it does this because of the low quality that the watch is. Also it is a lot smaller and compact possibly symbolizing a less financially stable position. There’s also a picture of the “Hello Kitty” cartoon on it which again suggests that it’s for children and those less financially stable and something temporary. 

Argument 1: Between all the symbols of patriotism they all differ in their own way but all present the same general ideas of representing what their country stands for.

Argument 2: Between the two watches, one can infer that Rolex is for those who are financially stable and for those who are successful. Compared to Hello Kitty which is something that’s just temporary 

Reading Sources Critically

1.       Made the argument about double standards on when, how and if it’s appropriate between black people and white people. Our whole history has been written in double standards. The way teaching is currently handled when talking about classic texts that contain the word teaching can be taught in a non-racist way but as it is currently, that’s not happening. It’s not our job to help them reclaim the word, yet if we want to help we can, “march on the school boards, the police stations and health care”.

2.       I find the argument extremely persuasive. One reason for his argument is the word has been used as a slur and not in a friendly manner. Secondly we, white people, have to realize that there’s a history behind the word, it’s something that should be between black people. The one thing I disagree with is his use of a redneck example because there’s not nearly the significance behind it. He acknowledges the opposing arguments more than I would’ve thought of.

3.       It obvious that he doesn’t agree with white people using the n-word and that it should be left to black people and there isn’t nearly the emotional and historical impact on us as compared to them.

4.       Boston Colleges’ stance is of one that’s against the use of the word in general. Given the website there are many articles and discussions concerning the use of the word and professors on the topic.

5.       Compared to the speech from time wise, Boston College is still against it. However the college gives more historical context of the word. For example in another video they present the idea that the word was originally used to sell things like, “Nigger Clams”.

6.       This topic goes against what we think. We believe that the constitution presented to the people of America Freedom of Speech. It’s been around for a long time and yes people can use it as a slur but same can go for white people. So in reality we believe that people should try to make a disconnect between the word and a racial slur because it’s going to be around for a long time but it’s not necessarily bad.

7.       The intended audience is for everyone who have used the word or are around the word. This is his audience because they want people to acknowledge what they are using and the context behind it. His purpose is to have people aware of when, how and if it’s appropriate to the use the word and who is saying it. Even though it doesn’t affect you it affects others. He gave an example of him being from the south and jokes that are made about him but it’s not necessarily bad because the person making it is from the south so it’s okay. 

Taking Stock of Your Writing paper 2

Taking Stock Questions

1.      I went about the texts by first looking at what was actually presented by them. Looking at the images and text mainly. I was very critical about them and as I inferred more I ended up getting deeper and deeper into them.

2.      I initially started with understanding the ads completely first. I then put those main ideas in the draft and then connected them all after that.

3.      I think I organized it pretty well. If anything I could’ve probably used simpler words in some instances.

4.      Yes, I provided a large deal of evidence per each point presented.

5.      I think I connected abstract ideas and hidden ideals presented by the ads very well.

6.      I could have probably added more to each explanation in some cases.

7.      I used three visuals and they were all very key in my explanations. Words alone couldn’t portray the same thing the ad does in itself because of how heavily I analyzed them in some cases.

8.      It made me want to go deeper and deeper into the ads the more and more responses I got because everyone said it was intriguing.

9.      I would maybe choose ads next time that their meanings and objectives weren’t so deeply hidden.

10.  I am very pleased with the result of my analysis. It taught me a lot about just exactly how phone advertisements have evolved and how they go about their goals in their own ways and I would definitely delve more into these ads once they come about.

11.  I can take away the ways I used to grab peoples attentions by using rhetorical questions and leaving a moving closing statement. 

Two Sisters Tragic Story Emotional Appeal

The video titled, "Two Sisters Tragic Story" establishes what kind of appeal it is immediately. The first thing you hear from the video is, "Grief has consumed a local community after two teenage sisters died in a early morning crash". This tells us that the type of appeal they're aiming for is emotional appeal. There can also be a logical appeal in about this YouTube ad. The idea that drunk driving kills and this video can be viewed as a fact to that statement. However the emotional appeal is much more suited because of the opening as well as the music they use. It's emotion provoking music that, in the right situations, can make you cry or become emotional yourself. They put some key titles on the screen through out the video which sort of tell their path as they went through it. The process of realizing what happened and then putting it together and moving on and coming to terms and building a legacy. The parents had some very powerful things to say, mainly being that their kids made a mistake and it costed their lives, they don't want them to be forgotten but from that event came positivity. After that event the community added a system for people to call a number and have them be riven home and they thought they weren't suited to do so and also they implemented a driving course for kids of their age.

Thinking about your writing in a conversation

My latest example of a topic that expresses a position is between my father and I discussing us getting new phones in the spring. Examining the conversation to me it seems that my position was very clear. I said that "if we get new phones in the spring it would allow you and I to do quite a number of things more. For example I run out of space on my phone quite often so it would be a good idea to get a phone with a larger space capacity. Secondly the new IPhone 6S processes information faster than the mac book  pro so it offers a lot more opportunities and accessibility on a mobile device." My point was pretty clear but there wasn't many oppositions from my dad but I feel as though it was clear.

"Yes, we can" Video Response

President Obama's speech on it's own is powerful and moving in its own but the video from Will.I.Am gives it a lot more power. Obama has pushed for one thing since he was elected, change, that's been his number one goal and the speech portrays that as well. However in the video with the addition of music, actors and their voices and the written words gives a stronger connection to us. Music naturally gives anything more power and connectivity to people, that's why so many people enjoy certain songs. Whether that be Christmas carols or Rock and Roll or Country  or Hip Hop. To each their own. Yet the video gives us a personal connection because it uses people we know, who we look up to or people we know that are in that situation and they're all speaking to the same thing. Change and yes we can. The words that are highlighted on the screen also gives it more power because it highlights the most powerful words and the words that the speech centers on to emphasize them.

Paper 2 Rough Draft

Christopher Burning

English 101-5:30

Dr. Sonia Begert

11/2/15

The Assimilation of Advertisements Through the Years: IPhones

          

           The core purpose of advertisements has always been to persuade their viewer to either support what they present. IPhone ads are no different, however, as the phones have entered new generations so have the ads themselves. The main point of IPhone ads has always been to purchase the phone and join the loyalty that is the Apple community. The ways each ad goes about that goal though is something totally in its own.

           This ad from Apple in 2011 (Figure 1) features the IPhone 4 and a very key slogan. There are quite a number of things in this ad itself that support the idea of Apple being centered on selling the phone and gaining a larger community. The first thing to note about this ad is the audience in which they’re centering on. To most people they would see the ad targeting the general consumer but analyzing it deeper reveals that hidden under the initial audience is the audience of family/ friends. Now the ad can sway either way, most ads are driven towards a certain audience but when it comes to phones that audience is extremely diverse. So finding a specific targeted audience may not be as obvious as in other ads. Although, as far as the not so obvious targeted audience goes, one can interpret it that way because of the conversation that’s happening within the phone itself. One can see it as either a conversation between two friends or possibly a father and son giving the idea of family/friends. The given simplicity of the ad is also another way it shows their focus audience. For example in Figure 1 the ad uses words such as, “Easy” and “Quickly”. These are all words that everyone can understand, even those who don’t know much English or are poorly educated can understand that the ad is implying that the phone is easy to use and fast. Additionally the structure of the ad maintains simplicity so, again, it can speak to many people. Then looking at the slogan as a whole reveals it’s extremely short and to the point furthering the ability for everyone to understand it. These things all tell us what the purpose of this ad is. By highlighting the ease of their product, possibly compared to the difficulty of usage of other phones, it tries to sell you into the phone to experience that ease. They also highlight the communication that they’re talking about within the ad. They’re keeping the value of family, or general, communication within mind by highlighting it within the phone in the ad.

           Similar to the aforementioned ad. This IPhone 5 ad from Apple in 2013 (Figure 2) features the new phone and a slogan that might seem innocent on the surface but it presents a lot more when looked into. Again this ad presents Apple wanting to sell their new phone and to persuade those who haven’t bought their new phone to buy it, essentially joining the “So many” that do love it and have it. The similarities to note between this ad and the IPhone 4 ad is the words usage. Again the ad uses the word “Easy” making sure to use simple language so as it can reach across language barriers. Another similarity is the slogan. The structure of the ad, again, is simple and to the point. The focus audience hasn’t changed but the secondary audience has. Looking into the ad deeper one can interpret a different secondary audience than the first ad, this time, it being towards technology lover/those who love their phones. There’s a lot more to this ad though. Upon first reading of the ad many questions can pop up from it. Why is it so easy to love the phone? What makes this phone so special? That’s exactly what the ad wants to do. It leaves many open ends about the phone which elicits curiosity from the reader. It does it quite effectively